Well presented

Hypocrisy makes me mad. So does falsity, that unknown or accidental hypocrisy. I would rather a person humbly express their brokenness than, in their insecurity, present themselves as something other than they are and make me play their twisted game. At first the game looks fine - in fact, it looks like real life, not a game at all. And any sensible, nice, normal person would play along. So it begins, in trust or untrust, letting your guard down or trying to keep it up. And soon you can feel that it's not what they said it was. When they implied that we're equals here or that they cared for you, they lied.

So hypocrisy and falsity make me mad. Sometimes they creep up on me slow and I'm immeshed before I know; other times I can sense it straight away. Everything pushes me to keep playing: terrible anger, biting ridicule or quiet offence wait for those who rebel. I hate this too. So now I'm trapped: they're using me and I'm trapped, and, if I care about them, I'm going to end up hurt, and, if I don't, it reminds me of the other times.

Maturity leaves me and anger holds me in thrall, mind and heart full. I might withdraw in grumpy silence, or perhaps snarky comments will dart out my mouth or I'll lose it altogether. All because they were too insecure to be who they really are... and because I'm so insecure I need their care.

There's no reason for this when I'm a daughter of the Living Almighty God, who died so tenderly for me and walks me through each day. There's no need to shut my eyes to him. If I really am safe in him - and I am - I'm safe even when people play games with me. They've got their own stuff going on. It's wrong of them to use me, but I should feel for them. Instead of playing along, instead of reacting, I should hold my confidence in his love and gently, calmly refuse to take on my role. They won't like it and that's okay. Standing in my Father's love, I can be sincere and kind and grant them the respect they deserve as precious creations of God.