My Driving Forces: Hypocrisy and Integrity

I detest hypocrisy because I've seen its destructiveness. It says it is one, good thing and it promises you much, then it dishes out evil. It presents itself to the world and gains friendship and respect, but it was always a self-serving lie. I never want to be like that. I am, however, sort of happy to have experienced it because it drives me to integrity.

I'm convinced that there's no point believing or subscribing to or championing anything if I don't do my damnedest to live it out - when no-one (except God!) is watching; in the hard times; in the unsatisfying, unfulfilling and seemingly life-denying times; in the small things; in my thoughts and motivations. If this stuff means anything, then it has to play out in everything.

I didn't used to hold to this, but that was because I believed in small things and my belief was uncertain. But now that I believe in big, overarching, undergirding things, it is important to me to practise what I preach. If I say there is a loving, just God then I must trust him and obey him or else it's all a sham.